Today, Jon and I will be interviewing our 2nd midwife.
The first appointment I was nervous, not well read and didn’t feel comfortable asking the difficult questions. In a previous post I wrote about how to choose a midwife versus an obstetrician, and how to choose the right midwife team.
Today, I have an even more thorough list of questions so that I can decide between the 2 midwife groups. After polling the MummyCare Community and reading Dr. Sears, “The Birth Book“, I have more questions:
- When did you graduate and how many births have you attended as a primary?
- What emergency situations have you personally dealt with?
- Have you dealt with polyhydramnios? Shoulder dystocia? Placenta previa? Abruptio placentae? Meconium aspiration? Gestational diabetes? Pre-eclampsia? Failure to progress? Cord prolaps? Cord around baby’s neck? Neonatal resuscitation?
- Have any babies or mother’s not made it during a labor you attended? How did you deal with it?
- Are you able to maintain control if an epidural is required?
- Does the hospital allow walking epidurals?
- How often are home births transferred to hospital for first babies?
- How common is intervention in a planned hospital birth?
- If we wanted a hospital birth would we be able to use the private birthing room?
- Who would be the midwife team for my labor? Could I contact the back-up obstetrician with questions?
- Will I meet with the midwife team before labor?
And it’s not that one midwife is better than the other, but a combination of factors that make one situation more desirable and safer than another.
- Midwife team #1 PRO: Is located closer to our condo so we can labor comfortably at home.
- Midwife term #1 CON: The closest hospital is a 30 min drive in regular traffic, the midwife graduated last year and has less experience.
This next center that I am interviewing also has it’s pros and cons:
- Midwife team #1 PRO: The midwife that has been assigned to me delivered a friend’s baby and they had a positive experience, the hospital is 5 minutes from my parent’s home, they have a comfortable birthing room with a tub
- Midwife team #1 CON: I would need to labor at my parents home, which may not be as comfortable
Being prepared means that you will be able to relax, trust your body and trust your birthing team.
However, being over-prepared can run you into some issues as well. The more details we attach ourselves to, the more disappointed and resistant we are to change. Labor seldom works out exactly as you predict or want.
- Maybe you will be in more pain than you expected and need to relax with an epidural.
- Maybe you will notice that you are failing to progress and it’s in the best interest of baby to be transferred to the hospital.
- Maybe you will tear or get an episiotomy even after doing all your perineal exercises.
- Maybe you are unable to do the breathing techniques you practiced for months.
These are all quite common situations that occur during birth. It’s important to stay calm, relaxed and trust that thing will progress as they should. Your midwife team is there to make sure you and baby are safe.
And if you have trouble concentrating on staying calm, I recommend getting a doula. They will be able to walk you through breathing techniques, massage any cramps and support your mental health.
Good luck and if you have any questions, make sure to add yourself to our MummyCare Community so that you get the medical support you’ve been wanting.